Happily Never After Day
Today is the day before the last day
Not exactly the very last day
But the last day of 40 years
Hopefully, anyway
Not that I ever hoped for any of this
I never hoped for any of this
I never imagined any of this
But here it is
Inflicted on me like a savage and rabid animal bite
on my once idyllic life
The thing done by them, for only them
That has brought me and him
To this day before the last day
An ending, a beginning
For me and him
For them
For this thing
I need to be done with
I keep believing and seeing all I know I have lost
I don't know how you don't do that
When the life you knew
Is suddenly and viciously taken away from you
He took much from himself too
Even more than me
It seems
But
The loss of me and the kids and the house and
all the bridges we built
Were worth what he gained, I suppose
As, he has recklessly abandoned and burnt
all of that down
to the ground
I keep telling myself
This tomorrow day
Is the end of my one life
But the beginning of another
A new
Promising, even
A day that could and should and can
Resolve the uncertainty
The months of chaos I have been going through
It can be this day
That ends not just the forty year thing
I have most of my life clung to
But
The day
I become someone new
Not broken and defeated
Not thrown away like a ravaged and torn apart carcass
in the trash
But
A woman
With much to offer
Not just the world
From all I have been through
But
To another man one day
That gets to have the new me
I intend to nurture and create
Beyond tomorrow
Beyond the
happily never after day
of him and me
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