My Space

My Space

                There is a certain amount of this life

                    that is just yours

                Space only you occupy and solidify and justify and identify

                I try to be positive in the space of life that is mine

                I have come to learn in recent months

                That it is my positivity

                    that led to my demise

                My blind and naive belief

                That the shine that is mine

                Helps others find their place in the light

                What it also does and did

                    is

                Lends to others permission, the right

                    to possibly forage what is mine

                I draw them in like moths to a flame

                I surround them with smiles and words and arms spread wide

                Only to recently realize

                It is by my giving nature

                I have only myself to blame

                    for giving away what is mine



                I trust too easily

                Give too freely

                Forgive like it is a superpower

                    it is a superpower of mine

                All of it

                Here ... take my shine

                Here ... take my smile, my arms spread wide

                Wrap what is me and mine

                Weave it into your own life

                Then ...

                When I turn away

                And turn back again

                I plainly see

                The space of life that I made for him and me

                I let you in

                    too closely

                I allowed you to believe that what is mine is also yours

                It is what I do

                    and did

                        stupidly



                I gave it away unknowingly

                    naively

                        trustingly

                That space in my life

                That part of me

                I felt was generous and genuine

                To people I allowed closest to me

                It's gone now

                Bits and parts of me that once only shined

                For each of them

                They took it with them

                A space of my life

                    I am to blame

                For sharing the shine I created for me and him

                            with her ...