Shattering

 

Shattering

                I told my son recently that I am in a constant state of shattering

                I don't know how shattered you can become

                I mean, how shattered can a person become?

                Where and how are you so broken that you are unmendable?

                Forever, really, I believed I was unbreakable

                I learned quickly, the truth about that

                I learned, even I can be broken

                Fuck epiphanies that slap you and crash you

                Fuck things and those that knock you to your knees

                    bend you like a tree in a fierce wind

                    until you're broken and withering

                        on a ground that keeps shifting


                I have learned a lot of things about a lot things lately

                From people I trusted and loved

                Things that force me to question

                    truth

                    responsibility

                    respect

                    disgrace

                    defeat

                    love

                I haven't learned answers yet, only to ask the question

                Where and why in all of my life

                    did I

                    neglect

                    to

                    learn how to identify

                       betrayal and transgression?